October 23, 2018

Recognizing Post Adoption Depression Syndrome

Did you know that Post Adoption Depression Syndrome (PADS) is a real thing? It seems cruel, doesn’t it? That you could do everything in your power to bring a child into your life, and then it happens and you’re overwhelmed by sadness. But PADS is a real thing, and just like with Post Partum Depression Syndrome, feeling this way does not mean that you’re a bad person or will be a bad parent.

Next week we’re going to talk about what to do if you have Post Adoption Depression Syndrome, but today we’ll be sharing information on how to recognize it in yourself.

There can be a great deal of confusion that comes up after you adopt. Perhaps you feel exhausted and overwhelmed, unsure of whether or not you made the right decision. And then of course there’s the irrepressible guilt that comes with even questioning such a thing.

Because of the hard-won emotional process so many adoptive parents endure, there can be a real sense — both within yourself, and projected onto you by others — that you should be ecstatic. Grateful! Thrilled! Consumed by only happy thoughts! And the shame that comes from not feeling this way often forces new adoptive parents to repress their true feelings, which only exacerbates the hurt, pain, and sadness.

Post Adoption Depression Syndrome is not something you can control. You do not bring it on yourself.

Here are some of the common symptoms:

Depression

Anxiety

Feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, loneliness, guilt, and low self-esteem

Suicidal thoughts or actions

Panic or anxiety attacks

Excessive fatigue, trouble motivating or getting out of bed

Challenges getting to sleep

Lack of interest in things you’ve always enjoyed

Difficulty concentrating, brain fog

Nausea, or changes in weight

If you’re feeling ANY of these symptoms, or if you feel that you are a risk to yourself, your family, or your new child, it’s vital that you get help. We’ll be sharing more of those resources in our next post, but that means opening up to your doctors or a mental health professional as soon as possible. This is not something you need to endure alone, and the sooner you get help, the better.