May 10, 2023

Hospital Adoption: What Should You Bring?

A hospital adoption is one of the biggest life events that can happen for a birthmother or adoptive family. While the process may look and feel different for both parties, it’s a decision the birthmother and the family made to provide the best life for the baby.

Being selected for a hospital adoption may be a long-awaited event for the family. Whatever drives their decision to adopt, finally being chosen by a birthmother is the greatest gift a family can receive.

As a birthmother, your decision to pursue a hospital adoption can be challenging. Your selfless choice will gift your child with a loving and supportive family.

Preparing for a hospital adoption looks different for the birth mother and the new family. Learn more about what you can expect from the hospital adoption process and the items to add to your packing list.

What Is a Hospital Adoption?

The adoption process looks different for every birthmother. You can decide to start your adoption process at any time, from the moment you find out you’re pregnant to after you’ve given birth.

While many birthmothers decide adoption is the best option for them and their babies while they’re at the hospital, others choose to make an adoption plan. A hospital adoption plan is a birth plan for the birthmother and adoptive family to follow while they’re at the hospital. This plan prepares the birthmother for the baby’s delivery and outlines their desired hospital experience.

As the birthmother, it’s important to consider these factors when creating your hospital adoption plan:

Who will the delivering doctor be?
Who will be in the room during delivery — will anyone from the adoptive family be invited?
What is your preferred delivery method?
Do you want to accept or forgo pain medication?
Who will hold the baby first — you or the adoptive family?
Will any members of your support system be at the hospital?
How much time will you spend with your baby?
Will you spend time with the adoptive family after delivery?
Do you want someone to take photos of just you and your baby?
Are you bringing any special gifts or keepsakes for your baby?
Do you want to spend alone time with your baby?
Will you leave the hospital before or after your baby leaves with their adoptive family?

A hospital adoption is a personal process, and adoption specialists will work with the birthmother to ensure they’re comfortable with the decisions they’re making.

Hospital Adoption Process

The hospital adoption process is similar to any other adoption, though this process moves a little faster.

The right time to choose adoption is when the birthmother is ready. If you decide that adoption is the best choice for your baby when you arrive at the hospital for labor and delivery, adoption specialists can organize your adoption plan then.

These five steps outline what you can expect from the hospital adoption process.

1. Decide on Adoption

It’s helpful to collect all of the resources and talk to adoption professionals about the process when you decide that adoption is right for you. If you’re leaning towards adoption, these considerations can help you come to the best decision:

Take a personal assessment: What are your reasons for adopting? These can be anything — money concerns, not wanting to be a single parent, wanting to complete school, focusing on your career or wanting to ensure your baby is cared for by a loving and supportive family.
What adoption can offer a baby: Choosing adoption is a generous and selfless decision. Adoption can offer your baby a stable home, loving family members, financial security and numerous opportunities for a happy and healthy life. Some birthmothers aren’t ready to provide these benefits, making the choice of adoption appealing.

You’re the only person who knows if adoption is the right decision for you. It’s crucial to account for your feelings and reasons for considering adoption. Adoption agencies can offer resources and support to help you feel confident in your decision.

2. Call the Adoption Agency

When you decide a hospital adoption is the best choice for you, you should contact an adoption agency. It’s best to contact an adoption agency familiar with the hospital adoption process, like Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions. Agencies who have experience with fast-paced hospital adoptions can make the process smooth for both the birthmother and the adoptive family.

These agencies will also have connections with multiple adoptive families you can choose from to find the best supportive and loving family for your baby. Since adoptive families are often willing to travel to your location immediately to complete a hospital adoption, making your decision at the hospital still leaves you with plenty of options in the adoption process.

3. Select the Adoptive Family

Once you’ve chosen an adoption agency, you can start looking at potential adoptive families. The agency will provide you with various options even if you decide on a last-minute hospital adoption plan. An adoption specialist will guide you through different adoptive family profiles so you can learn about their level of schooling, occupations, lifestyles and more.

When you’re looking through possible adoptive families, create a list of essential factors that will influence your choice:

The type of adoption: This entails either wanting to build a close relationship with the adoptive family, going through the adoptive agency for updates on your child or having minimal contact with the adoptive family. The type of adoption you choose is completely up to you and how much you want to stay in your child’s life after their adoption.
List your values: Creating a list of your values and wishes for your child can help you choose the right adoptive family. Factors that may influence your decision include how close the family lives to you, their hobbies and interests, their religion, the size of their family and plans for other children, their work life or whether they’re a single parent.
Express your preferences to your adoption agency: The agency professionals will work with you to ensure your baby is with a family that fits your values. They’ll provide you with multiple potential families and help point out options that best match your expectations.

4. Grant Official Consent for Adoption

After you have your baby and select the adoptive family, it’s time to start the process of officially consenting to the adoption. How this part goes is all up to you. Do you want to meet with the adoptive family and mingle? Do you want to spend time with your baby alone before handing them over to their adoptive family? The adoption agency will help walk you through which scenarios will work best for you and your baby.

The waiting period between your baby’s birth and when they unite with their new adoptive family varies by state. You’ll officially grant consent for the adoption after the waiting period, signing over your parental rights to the adoptive family.

This step in the process can be understandably emotional for birthmothers. While you’re completing the paperwork, know that you came to this decision for good reasons and determined it was the best outcome for you and your baby.

5. Adjust to Life Post Adoption

Finally, you’ll start the process of adapting to your life post-hospital adoption.

Your communication level with your baby and the adoptive family will vary depending on the type of adoption you decide on. You can stay in touch with your baby and their adoptive family through photos, handwritten letters, video calls, phone calls or in-person visits.

It’s up to you to decide the level of communication you’re comfortable with and what relationship you want to have with your baby. Granting official consent for adoption can be “see you soon” rather than “goodbye.”

Packing List for Birthmother

Getting ready for your hospital stay and the hospital adoption process requires narrowing down your birth plan, emotionally preparing for the experience and packing your hospital bag. As the birth mother, you’ll need a few essentials for yourself during the labor and delivery process, items for self-care after delivery and a few things for the adoption process. Take a look at this packing list for the must-haves to bring to the hospital:

Underwear: While the hospital will provide you with some, you’ll probably feel more comfortable with your own.
Clothes: Important clothing items include warm socks, pajamas and a comfortable outfit to wear home.
Important documents: Remember to bring your ID, adoption paperwork if you’ve already decided on a hospital adoption, insurance information and your written birth plan.
Toiletries: Bring everything you typically use at home, like your shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste, toothbrush, hairbrush, etc.
Entertainment: Pack your phone, phone charger, magazines, tablet and any other items to keep yourself busy during your hospital stay.
Gift for your baby and adoptive family: Bringing a gift for your baby or the adoptive family is a great idea. This gift can be a souvenir for your baby to remember you by.

Packing List for Adoptive Family

The adoptive family should also be ready when they receive the call that they’ve been selected to be a part of a hospital adoption. The adoptive family will need to create two different packing lists — one for the baby and one for themselves.

List for Baby

The items you should take to the hospital when adopting a baby include:

Approved car seat: Hospitals require all parents to have an approved car seat before leaving. It’s best to take time and learn how to install the car seat in a car. Families can also purchase a car seat cover to ensure the baby is comfortable.
Diaper bag: Fill the baby’s diaper bag with diapers, wipes, receiving blankets, baby lotion and burp cloths. The hospital should have all the diapers and wipes you’ll need, but it’s good practice to pack up your diaper bag before heading to the hospital.
Baby blanket: Pick out the perfect “baby’s first blanket” to bring to the hospital and snuggle your baby for the first time.
Bottles: Pack your preferred formula and a few bottles to bring to the hospital. While the hospital will likely have formula samples for you to use, it’s good to be prepared when you’re bonding with your baby for the first time.
Newborn outfits: Select a few going-home outfits for your baby in various sizes. Also, bring some adorable hats and socks, so your baby is ready to leave the hospital.

List for Parents

Check out this complete list of things adoptive parents should bring to the hospital:

Toiletries: Remember to bring all your toiletries like shampoo, toothpaste, deodorant, face wipes, etc. The adoption waiting period varies state by state, so pack enough toiletries for a few nights.
Clothes: Pack comfortable clothes for your stay. Since you may be getting a last-minute call about the adoption, it’s a good idea to prepare what you can ahead of time, like pajamas, day clothes and a robe.
Pediatrician’s phone number: The hospital’s medical staff will ask for your pediatrician’s contact information. Include all information like phone number, email, fax, etc.
Camera: You’ll want your camera to capture this day!
Snacks and drinks: Bring plenty of snacks and drinks for your time at the hospital. You’ll appreciate having your favorite treats while you’re waiting to take your baby home.
Entertainment items: Bring your phone charger, phone, books and any other entertainment items to keep yourselves busy during downtime.
Gift for the birthmother: Giving a gift to the birthmother is a wonderful way to establish a connection. Anything from a thank you card to a memento of the day can be a special gift thanking them for their selfless decision.

Frequently Asked Questions

Do you have more questions about the hospital adoption process? Check out these common questions from birthmothers:

Can You Leave a Baby at the Hospital if You “Don’t Want It?”

In many states, yes. If the child is within the state’s Safe Haven age limit, a hospital staff member will start the process of finding a home for the baby after their parent surrenders them.

Can You Surrender Your Baby After Birth?

Yes. Birthmothers can surrender their baby after birth at the hospital. If the birthmother is not at the hospital, Safe Haven locations vary by state.

Where Do Abandoned Babies Go?

Babies left at Safe Haven locations typically become a ward of the state until they receive an adoptive family. The process depends on the state’s adoption laws.

When Should You Make an Adoptive Plan?

Whether you decide the adoption is the right choice for you the moment you find out you’re pregnant or when you arrive at the hospital to deliver your baby, the adoption professionals at Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions can help navigate you through the process. Abby’s can provide you with all of the information you need as a birthmother or guide you through the adoption process as an adoptive family.