Frequently Asked Questions for Adoptive Families
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When should we sign and return the Agreement?
When you complete your Application you should sign and return the Agreement. The majority of the agreement will not apply until you have been matched, however; portions of it do apply immediately and we will need a signed agreement before we can consider you for adoption situations.
Most importantly — review the contract and/or have an attorney review the contract so that you are fully aware of its conditions. We cannot stress this enough. Our goal is to minimize the uncertainty and stress that can develop in the adoption process, especially if things do not go as planned. Not only is the agreement a legal document but it is very informative and will help you to understand how our agency works and what you can, and cannot expect. Many adoption agencies vary in the services they offer as well as the conditions of those services. You will want to make certain you understand our services and the conditions of our agreement. If you have questions or need clarification on the agreement — please contact us.
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How long is the Agreement good for?
The agreement is valid for 12 months from the date you sign it. If you have not been matched with a Birthmother within 12 months and would like to continue with the agency, signing the agency’s most current agreement will be required. There are no fees or costs associated with the application process.
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What should we consider when making our adoption budget?
Know your adoption budget and what you are capable of. Typically, you can break the total adoption costs into the following five categories;
• Homestudy/Post Placement Fees. Depending on your state, our agency can provide this service or direct you to a licensed professional that can provide this service. These are typically fixed fees and are easy to identify in a budget.
• Agency Fees. Our agreement details our multiple service options and the fees associated with them. This is a fixed fee as well and is easy to identify in a budget.
• Legal Fees. If you live in a different state than your birthmother, you will be required to have qualified adoption attorneys in both states to complete your adoption. In addition, some states require that a second adoption agency licensed within the birthmother’s state be involved in some of the processes as well. The costs associated with the legal aspects of your adoption can vary greatly depending on which attorneys you use. It is difficult to definitively budget for this service — especially without knowing what state your birthmother will be in. Our agency’s Traditional Service does offer all the legal services associated with completing your adoption for a fixed fee — regardless of the states, time, or costs involved.
• Birthmother Expenses. In our agency’s process of qualifying a birthmother for placement, a great deal of emphasis and attention is given to this subject. To the best of our ability we attempt to understand all the expenses associated with each and every birthmother. We do not coach or assist birthmothers to represent more or less than they feel they actually need. Too be direct — birthmother expenses are what they are. Some birthmothers require none to little, most require a reasonable amount, and some ask for more than may seem practical. The amount you budget for this category can have a direct impact on the number of birthmother situations you will qualify for. Budget a range you feel comfortable with.
• Travel Expenses. This is a tough category to budget until you are presented with a situation and have a better idea of where the birthmother is located. However, you will want to take into account that if it is an out of state adoption, interstate compact may require you stay within the birthmother state for a period of time until interstate compact approval.
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Why should we use your Legal Services?
Our agency strongly recommends utilizing our legal services as this will turn the financial unknowns and variables associated with legal expenses into a set fee. We will utilize our nationwide network of qualified and experienced adoption attorneys to provide complete legal services to represent you and the birthmother within each state through adoption finalization. Our network of attorneys specialize in adoption and is the most qualified within the industry. Our agency has on staff a Legal Coordinator focused only on the day-to-day coordination required to complete the legal process. She is your direct contact and will minimize the effort, stress, and time required to legally complete your adoption.
If you elect not to utilize our legal services, we strongly suggest you seek an attorney in your state, as well as the birthmother state, that is experienced in adoption and interstate compact. A bankruptcy attorney — no matter how reputable they are — just won’t due. Adoption law varies too much from state to state and is far too critical of a process to risk utilizing anyone other than an adoption specialist. Adoptions that fail or are overturned because of legal missteps or oversights can be devastating.
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What does the Legal fee go towards?
When you select our Traditional Service, the legal portion of the fees you provide are a set amount. Attorney and legal fees have proven to be the most inconsistent and unknown cost of any adoption. Our clients have shared that there is significant value in these expenses becoming a set fee with no risk of expense overages.
The legal portion of the Traditional Service fee goes towards several expenses. The majority is allocated towards the projected cost associated with attorneys for both the adoptive family and birthmother as well as the need for a secondary agency in certain states that require such. A share of this fee is also allocated for our agency legal coordinators efforts in securing and coordinating these attorneys throughout the adoption process. And finally, it is important to understand that there is significant costs associated with building and maintaining the nationwide network of attorneys we utilize. Finding, interviewing, and qualifying adoption attorneys throughout the country requires a full time staff member dedicated exclusively to this task. A portion of the fee you provide goes towards this expense thus providing you with the most qualified adoption attorneys and personalized service.
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Should we be concerned if a Birthmother request living expenses?
It is not always reasonable to assume that a Birthmother will or is capable of supporting herself throughout her pregnancy. Monthly expenses for rent, utilities, food, clothing, and transportation are typically viewed by most states as “reasonable living expenses” and allow an adoptive family to pay for these expenses during the duration of her pregnancy and in some circumstances for a period of “Post Partum”. Most birthmothers know this and it should not be considered a “red flag” if they ask for living and medical expenses to be paid. Negotiating to have all her expenses paid in a lump sum after she terminates her parental rights is not a realistic option. Her landlord and utility companies will not defer rent and payments for several months until she gives birth.
Prior to matching with a birthmother, you will be presented with a summation of the living and medical expenses expected per month, or in total, for the adoption. Expenses that exceed initial estimates by the birthmother may happen. Contrary to beliefs or suspicions, most of these instances are unintentional. However, invariably it may create skepticism. Always keep this in mind: when it comes to living expenses, you may question a birthmother’s honesty or integrity — but never question her sincerity to place her child for adoption — they are rarely related.
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How does the adoption process work?
Our agency does not typically work with “dear birthmother” or “family profile” letters. If is important to the birthmother, we will certainly request these from prospective families and provide them accordingly. Our philosophy not to utilize these as a tool is best summed up in an analogy: Most anyone can write a great job resume, however when it comes to the interview, applicants do not always represent as well as their resume. We strongly feel the process of selecting adoptive families and birthmothers in the interest of adoption deserves more communication than a well written letter.
Our agency will compare your application and goals with viable birthmothers. The application you complete is flagged with personal information that will not be shared with the birthmother at any point throughout the process. On paper, when a birthmother’s situation and goals align with yours we contact the birthmother and present your profile to her for review. We may discuss several adoptive families with her so that she has a choice. If she chooses your profile and indicates that she would be interested in pursuing an opportunity with your family, we will contact you to discuss her profile.
If both parties agree they would like to proceed further, we arrange a conference call so that you and the birthmother may have the opportunity to talk and get a better feel for each other. An agency coordinator will initiate the call and be on the line as well to help the interview flow. Only first names are used and no contact or defining information will be exchanged at this point. The potential for anxiety and nervousness is inherent — just be yourself and relax. The goal is to allow you and the birthmother to get a one-on-one sense if this is the right situation. Calls can range from 5 minutes to 2+ hours — there is no time limit or requirement.
After the interview call, we will contact you and the Birthmother separately to get your impressions and more importantly your thoughts on if you would like to be matched and proceed with each other. If both you and the birthmother agree, then you would move forward with providing the agency fee to secure the match.
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Are internet adoption forums a viable source for adoption research?
The internet can be a tremendous tool for researching adoption. There are a vast number of articles and publications available to help any family understand the many terms, processes and procedures prevalent in the adoption process. Also prevalent are adoption forums, chat rooms, blogs, etc. In concept, these entities were created to allow interactive conversations focused on exchanging relevant information. In reality, they are widely considered to be an open avenue for posting hearsay, second hand information, and unsubstantiated rumors as facts. Truths and reality become distorted and lost as stories are heard and told many times over. Most disappointing is they are written by individuals known only by screen names — their background and knowledge of adoption is largely unknown. You would be much better served using the internet as a tool to research more creditable adoption information.
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How does your agency find Birthmothers?
Advertising, advertising, advertising. Our agency currently advertises in over 170 million yellow page directories within 44 states. Our newspaper advertising campaign exceeds circulation of over 60 million papers nationwide. The agency’s qualifying and review process will reduce the 120+ birthmothers that contact us each month down to 10-15 birthmothers sincere and ready to commit to adoption.
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When do we pay the agency fee?
Our agency requires no application fees, deposits, or “up front” money. Agency fees are due only after you have successfully matched with a birthmother.
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What does the agency fee go towards?
It is important to understand that the time and effort we spend working with an Adoptive Family and Birthmother after a match has been made is only a small fraction of the actual costs associated with each adoption. Most of our agency’s expenses are incurred through nationwide advertising, staffing, and operating expenses dedicated to finding and qualifying the birthmothers before a match is even made. Once a match is made, the majority of our agency fee goes towards reimbursement for the costs we have already incurred.
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How should we make the payment?
Payment can be made in the form of a bank deposit (Wells Fargo), bank wire transfer, or certified bank check/money order overnight delivered to our corporate office. Personal checks will not be acceptable forms of payment. If you overnight the payment, we recommend that you utilize UPS or FedEx or any service that offers a tracking number for safety reasons. DHL has had some challenges in our area and would not be recommended as reliable (no offense to any of our clients that may work for DHL).
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When will we receive contact information for the Birthmother?
Contact information will be exchanged for the birthmother and adoptive family directly after the agency fees have been paid in full. You will receive a packet from our agency that will include everything you will need for the duration of your adoption.
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If our adoption fails, can we get a refund?
Yes. Our agency provides a substantial refund of the fees paid if your adoption fails. It is important to understand that the majority of our costs and efforts are focused on finding and managing birthmothers before a match is even made — not after. The costs associated with running an agency on a national level prevent us from offering a full refund for failed adoptions.
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If you could leave us with one thought — what would it be?
Most important is to trust your adoption agency. As the adoptive parents of two children we can personally empathize and understand firsthand your position and goals. Believe that we have your best interest in mind and are experienced and focused on helping families to grow through adoption. As a licensed child adoption agency — we are strictly bound by the policies and procedures required by the State of Iowa. You must have confidence and trust that we have your best interests in mind.