April 16, 2019

Surviving the Adoption Wait

The old saying is true: time moves slowly for those who wait. During the adoption journey, slow takes on a whole new meaning. But there are many ways to keep yourself busy while you’re waiting, and it’s not just busy work. There are real tasks that this waiting period gives you time to accomplish, and your post baby life will be so much easier once you’ve handled them.

Start with practical tasks, like finding a pediatrician or medical professional. This requires research and it won’t hurt to enlist the help of other parent friends to help you find the best fit for you and your expectations.

Make sure you are familiar with your company’s adoption leave policy and follow through on updating your insurance benefits. A lot of times, insurance will need month to kick in, so this is not a task to delay. If you’re a working parent, do you have your bases covered in terms of child care? Life is unpredictable and it’s important to have a team of helpers that you can depend on. Finding a trusted caregiver is a serious process that requires thorough research and vetting. If you’re choosing a childcare facility, rather than a situation that involves family or friends, make sure they are licensed and regulated. 

Taking a parenting class or joining social adoption groups is a great way to expand your knowledge and prepare for your future. Parenting classes explore practical care and will help you feel more at ease in your day to day life. Everyone can benefit from being a part of a community of peers where you can discuss similar experiences and learn from each other. The adoption process can feel very lonely and at times, endless, but finding a group who can empathize with your situation will help ease these nerves. Parenting an adopted child is a unique experience of its own, and it’s nice to have the support and camaraderie of people who truly understand that journey. 

Finally, make sure you take time for yourself. Self care is extremely important throughout the adoption journey. It is easy to feel helpless and like you want to give up. When you reach those moments, take a step back. Do something for yourself every day whether it be reading a book, getting your hair done, or having a massage. The waiting phase is the most difficult part of the adoption journey and no one can tell you how long it will last. Keep yourself busy, know that something beautiful is on the way, and take good care of yourself.